6

"I need your sample spreadsheets by the end of the week," Miss Calendar said, and the bell rang. "And I want both a paper printout and a copy on disk." The students began to file out. Willow got up, and Miss Calendar called to her. Boyfriend-stealing gypsy spy, she thought as she walked towards her desk.

The sad thing was that she had liked Miss Calendar, admired her. She was a good teacher, and she was into paganism, which Willow thought was neat. But even leaving aside the whole gypsy spy thing, she just couldn't get past her having had smoochies with Giles, and then being mean to him, wanting him back and shooting him with a crossbow. It was too many strikes against her.

"I might be a little late tomorrow," Miss Calendar said. "Do you think you could cover my class till I show?"

"Me? Teach the class?" In spite of herself, Willow grinned. "Sure!"

"Cool." Maybe Miss Calendar wasn't all bad.

Just then Giles and Buffy appeared at the door. Her heart leapt. She wondered how long she would have to be involved with Giles before her heart would stop leaping every time he walked into a room - or if maybe it always would. Even when he was trying to hide how he felt, the way he looked at her made her feel warm all over.

"Hi, Buffy. Rupert," Miss Calendar said. Willow took it back - Miss Calendar was all bad. It annoyed her to hear her call him Rupert, as if Miss Calendar had the copyright on his first name or something. Sometimes Willow just wished she would go away, so she didn't have to look at her, didn't have to hear her say Rupert in that sour yet meaningful way that meant she wanted to talk to him.

"Miss Calendar," Giles said, and Willow had to fight a smirk. He no longer called her Jenny. So there. Meow, she told herself exultantly.

Unfortunately she couldn't very well stick around - Buffy would expect her to come with her. Giles shot her an uncomfortable look, and she gave him a little grin, because he'd said Miss Calendar, not Jenny, and because she loved him and he was her boyfriend, not Miss Calendar's, even if nobody else knew about it. Well, except for Oz and Angel.

"Sorry, I have to talk to her," she told Buffy as they walked out.

"Whatever," Buffy said. "She's the least of my worries. Angel was in my room last night. He left a picture of me as a souvenir."

***

A couple of minutes later, Buffy had gone to class, and Willow met up with Giles in the hall. They walked towards the library. "You went to the Bronze last night?" he asked.

"Yes - with Buffy and Xander and Cordelia. It was fun. I missed you, though. Are we on for tonight?"

He smiled. "I'm looking forward to it."

"Me too." Her parents were out of town, and he was going to spend the night. "I need to do some lesson planning after school, though. Hopefully I'll get it all done before you come over. I might be teaching Miss Calendar's class tomorrow."

"Indeed?" He cleared his throat.

"Anything you want to tell me, Rupert?" She only called him Rupert on special occasions, usually when she was feeling a little grumpy.

He flashed her a grin that melted her into a puddle. "Oh, we're on a first name basis now, are we?" he asked. "She only wanted to - "

"Let me guess. She wanted to apologize. Again."

"Right. But she did loan me a book that might prove useful in finding a spell to keep Angel out." He held up the book he was carrying. I could've found that spell, Willow grumbled to herself. He doesn't need Miss Calendar and her books. "If I haven't found what we're looking for by this evening, I'll bring a book or two with me."

"You mean, we can be study buddies?"

He shot her another smile that hit her like a jolt between the legs. "Among other things."

***

That night Giles brought Chinese takeout. "This is so nice," she said, as they ate at the dining room table. They couldn't stop smiling at each other. It was the most delicious Chinese food she'd ever tasted.

After dinner, they settled on the living room sofa with their books and her laptop. While she was busy with her lesson plan and he with his research, the phone rang.

"Hi, Buffy," Willow said. Giles glanced up nervously.

They chatted a bit. Willow felt her face flush hot - she hated lying to her friend. "I just hope Giles can find a keep-out spell soon," Buffy said. "I know I'll sleep easier when I can...sleep easier."

Willow regarded him with delight - sitting on the couch, his nose in a book. "I'm sure he will. He's like, book-man."

Giles glanced up again and smiled. He waved the book in the air. Willow smothered a giggle.

"Well," Giles said after they'd been working for at least an hour longer, "I've turned up nothing so far. Perhaps I'll have another look at these books later."

"But I haven't finished my lesson plan. It's my first ever lesson plan, and I want it to be good." She grinned. "I know - I'll tell Miss Calendar I didn't have time to plan the lesson because we had a date."

"Very amusing. You've been working on the lesson plan for hours. I'm sure it's more than adequate."

"More than adequate? Oh, there's a ringing endorsement."

"I'm sure you'll be brilliant. In any case, I don't think I can wait any longer." He leaned over and kissed her.

"Oh." She closed her laptop and slammed shut her computer book. "Why didn't you say so? Come on - I'll show you my room."

***

"I know my room's awfully girly, and the bed's not terribly big," she said. "I hope you'll be comfy here." She had moved her stuffed animals off the bed in preparation for his arrival. Plus, she didn't exactly feel like Stuffed Animal Girl anymore - she had an actual man to hold onto in bed now.

From behind her, his arms went round her. "You're here. I'll be...comfy." It was funny to hear him say the word. "The bed is small, so we'll just have to stay close together all night."

She sighed happily. "It's wonderful to have you here. You have no idea how much I think about you when I'm here by myself."

His arms tightened around her. Then he said, "Willow, why does your aquarium have no fish in it?"

"Huh?" She peered at the fish tank. Then they found the envelope.

"Oh god, oh god," she kept saying. "He was here."

He held her. "I'm so sorry," he said. "But I swear, I won't let anything happen to you."

"Should we call Buffy? Maybe we should call Buffy. Except...we can't. I guess I could - I could pretend I'm here by myself."

"There's nothing she can do tonight," he said. "We don't have the protection spell. But surely between the two of us, we have some supplies. We can make do for tonight. You can tell her tomorrow at school." He touched her face.

She started to laugh.

"What?" he asked.

"You're awfully single-minded, aren't you? You still want smoochies tonight."

He quirked a smile. "Would that be so very awful of me?"

"Somehow it makes me less scared. Although...I feel all creepy crawly. My poor fish! But I'm so glad you're here." It made her feel guilty that her fish had been murdered and she still wanted smoochies too.

They both had crosses, and Giles had a flask of holy water and a couple of stakes. "Have you any cloves of garlic?" he asked, placing the crosses on either side of the bed pillows.

"Maybe some garlic powder in the spice rack?"

"No matter. It's unclear whether garlic truly repels vampires or whether that's a myth." He put the holy water and stakes at easy reach on the night table. Still dressed, they lay on the bed together, he on his back, she with her head on his chest. It was a little odd lying there flanked by crosses. Her heart was still beating fast - adrenaline from the death of her fish. But Giles felt awfully good against her.

He stroked her hair. "Willow, I'll understand if you don't want to..."

She shifted her position and kissed him hard.

"I see," Giles said when they came up for air. "I suppose the danger acts as an aphrodisiac?"

"You act as an aphrodisiac." She kissed him again. He pulled her on top of him. Before long she forgot all about everything but Giles kissing her, touching her, Giles moving inside her.

"I love sleeping with you," she said before they drifted off. "I mean, the actual sleeping. You feel so good. I wish we could do this every night." She was half-asleep, but it still struck her as a pretty bold statement.

He only pulled her closer. "Every night," he muttered, nearly asleep. "Always..."

His words, and his arms encircling her, made her feel warm and safe and happy. They slept.

***

In the morning when she woke, he was sitting up in bed. She took him in: Giles, naked, bespectacled, reading a book. It was quite a picture, his torso and beautiful arms (one with the tattoo) emerging from beneath the blankets, his eyes intent on the page.

"Mmm..." she purred, and he turned to smile at her.

"Good morning," he said.

"Come here," she said, and held out her arm.

"Just a moment," he said, and turned back to the book. "Yes, there it is - the ritual to revoke the invitation to vampires. I haven't the requisite herbs on hand. We'll have to perform the ritual after school."

"Good," she said. "Now come here."

He set the book on the floor, took off his glasses and put them on the night table. He put his arms around her. "What time is it?" she asked between kisses. "Do we have time to - "

"We have time," he growled.

***

After all that lesson planning, Miss Calendar showed up for school on time for her class. All that time wasted, Willow thought, watching her hurry towards the classroom building - time I could've spent having even more sex with Giles! Miss Calendar, grumble grumble, Miss Calendar, she thought.

That evening Buffy and Cordelia were at Willow's house, putting the finishing touches on the protection spell. As Willow nailed a cross to the wall, behind a curtain so her parents wouldn't see, she glowed with the memory of Giles making love to her in her bed.

"Willow," Cordelia said, "are you aware that there are no fish in your aquarium?"

She whimpered. Cordelia was doing a good job of dampening her secret glow.

"Cordelia, we've already done your car," Buffy said. "Call it a night if you want."

Cordy picked up her coat from the bed - and then she picked up an envelope that was under it. Not another envelope! She handed it to Willow. At least there were no more fish to murder.

She pulled out a folded sheet of paper. She unfolded it.

It was a drawing of her and Giles - a very good drawing of her and Giles, asleep in her bed. Their faces were soft, relaxed. The top of his strong chest was visible above the blankets, as was her bare arm flung across him. He was on his back, his lips slightly parted, hair mussed. She nestled into his side. Her hair was messy too.

Even though Angel had drawn the picture, she couldn't help but love it. It was the two of them, how they looked together. They looked beautiful. They fit.

Then reality came crashing down. "What is that?" Cordelia asked.

For a moment Willow contemplated stuffing the drawing in her pants pocket and disavowing its existence.

"Let me see," Buffy said, and took the paper.

"Eeeww, gross," Cordelia said. "Is that - eeeww, gross!"

"Angel's a little off his game," Buffy said. "What's he gonna do next, draw a picture of Cordelia in bed with Snyder?"

"Make me yak!" Cordelia said.

Hey, Willow wanted to say, watch it with the Giles-Snyder comparison! But the horror of it was beginning to penetrate. Angel in the bedroom while they slept, drawing them. Angel coming back, leaving the envelope. Buffy seeing the picture. But Buffy didn't believe it was real. Maybe Willow could play along.

"This is just weak," Buffy said, and made as if to rip the drawing in two.

"Buffy, don't!" Willow cried, before she could stop herself.

Buffy looked up at her slowly. She let the paper waft to the floor. "Willow?" she asked. "Don't even tell me."

"Wow," Cordelia said, "you really are a bigger freak than I thought. And Giles - robbing the cradle much?"

Willow couldn't stand the look of revulsion on Buffy's face, the scandalized amusement on Cordelia's.

"How..." Buffy said. "With Giles?" She looked like she was going to vomit. Willow fought the urge to run from the room. "You've what, been sneaking around behind our backs?" Buffy's voice shook.

"Well, we couldn't exactly hold hands at school. We knew you'd freak."

"'We'? Now you and Giles are a 'we'?"

"We are," she said softly, and even amidst this craziness, she was proud to say it. It felt good to actually get to say it. "We love each other."

Buffy looked like her head was about to spin around like a top. "I so do not understand."

"It does make a twisted kind of sense," Cordelia said. "They're both big book geeks who don't have lives. Now they can not have lives together."

"Hey!" Willow said.

"What? I'm defending you guys. You're perfect for each other. Aside from the mammoth age difference - but hey, Buffy's got you beat there."

"Hey!" Buffy said, sending a murderous glance at Cordy.

"I'm trying to help," Cordelia said.

"The thing is," Willow said, "no matter how upset you are, Buffy, there are things we need to do right now. We need to finish doing these protection spells, or we're gonna not have lives for real."

Buffy let out a sigh. "I can't argue with you there. So let's put aside this...this thing you've gone and done, until we've Angel-proofed my house."

"And Giles's place," Willow added. Buffy grimaced.

"I suppose you guys have been...spending time together there?" she asked. Then, before Willow could reply: "I so don't want to know. Let's get going."

As they drove to Buffy's house, Willow said, "Promise me you won't tell anyone. Giles could get in so much trouble - "

"Ya think?" Buffy asked.

"You mean like lose both his jobs and get deported? Oh, and arrested?" Cordelia asked, behind the wheel.

"Oh god, please don't tell anyone!"

"Even Xander?" Cordy asked.

"Well...I guess he should know, too," Willow said. God, she could just imagine his face when he found out. "But he can't go blabbing to people."

"Oh please," Cordelia said, "who would he tell? He doesn't have any friends besides us."

"Aren't you forgetting, Will?" Buffy asked. "Angel knows."

"I know," she whispered. Her head started to swim. Please, she thought, please let no one tell on us.

Cordelia dropped them off at Buffy's, then sped off, doubtless about to tell Xander the hot dirt. Willow and Buffy did the ritual without looking at each other, while Dawn kept interrupting: "What are you doing? Is that witchcraft? I'm telling."

"Could you be any more of a pain?" Buffy asked. But just as they finished the spell, the door opened, and in came Buffy's mom, with Angel trying to follow. The spell sure worked - Angel banged up against an invisible barrier.

"Sorry, Angel," Buffy said, "changed the locks."

But before she could slam the door in his face, he said, "So, match made in heaven, eh? Just because it didn't work out for us, doesn't mean we shouldn't give those crazy kids our support."

She shut the door, and Willow braced herself for another onslaught from her best friend. Instead Buffy's mother said, "So, Angel tells me you and he got very close before the two of you broke up."

Man, Willow thought, when it rains, it pours.

Buffy and her mom went up the stairs, Dawn following at their heels. "Go to your room, Dawn," Mrs. Summers said.

"But I wanna know what's happening!"

As soon as they were out of sight, Willow grabbed the phone. She called Giles at home - no answer. She tried the library, and he picked up. "Giles, I'm at Buffy's. Please get me out of here."

"What's wrong? Are you in danger?"

"No - the protection spell's working. We need to do your place now." She lowered her voice. "Angel did come back last night, while we were sleeping. He left a picture of us. Buffy and Cordelia saw it."

Silence on the other end.

"Giles?"

"I suppose we knew we'd be found out sooner or later. Is she very upset?"

"That's putting it mildly, but she kinda has her hands full right now. Angel paid her mom a visit and told her they slept together. Giles, please come and get me." She felt like she might start to cry.

"I'll be right there."

She paced the Summers living room, praying Giles would arrive before Buffy came back down the stairs. When she heard his car, she rushed out of the house.

"Are you all right?" he asked as they drove off.

"Better now," she said. He took her hand and squeezed it.

They drove to his place and did the protection spell. Soon after they finished, the phone rang. He picked it up. "Buffy, I..." His face fell as he listened. He handed the phone to Willow.

"I thought you might be there," Buffy said. "I tried calling your house, and when you didn't answer, I got worried."

"I'm okay. Thanks. Are things all right with you and your mom?"

"I'm glad you're safe. But that doesn't mean I'm okay with any of this. I'm far from okay with it." The line went dead.

"She hung up on me." Willow started to cry. Giles sat beside her on the couch. He put his arm around her. "This is all my fault. Buffy didn't want to believe it. I could've lied. I could've told her it was just Angel messing with us, that it didn't really happen. But I couldn't let her tear up the picture."

"It's a relief in a way, to have the truth out."

She sniffled. "But what if this ends up ruining your life? I begged them not to tell anyone. What if they do? Or what if Angel does? What if you get fired or arrested or deported, or maybe fired and arrested and - "

He kissed her mouth, soggy though she was. "Dearest, it's not as if we haven't all become adept at keeping secrets from Sunnydale at large."

He had a point there. She clung to him. "Promise me you won't leave me, whatever happens."

"I swear, I won't let anyone come between us." There was a fierce look in his eye.

"Even if Buffy's all disgusted with us? I know how much being her Watcher means to you."

"It does mean a great deal to me. But no one's more important to me than you, Willow." His gaze steadied her. "I think you know this isn't some passing fancy of mine. I want us to be together."

"I want that too." He kissed her again. When he kissed her like that, she could forget all of it, forget the awful way Buffy had looked at her.

***

In the morning, she stretched and settled back in Giles's arms. "I always sleep so much better with you," she said. "I wonder why that is?"

"Maybe it's because I've always just shagged you senseless." He grinned at her.

"I even feel ready to face them. Although I think I'd rather just barricade myself here with you for a week or so."

"While I appreciate the sentiment, I think we'll have to settle for..." He took her hand and placed it on his erection.

"More shagging?" His cock butted against her hand - always so eager for her. Then his fingers were flicking her nipples and stroking her between the legs. "So good," she sighed. "Always so good." Always, she thought. If we can always be together, it will be all right.

***

"Now I'm nervous again," she said as they hurriedly finished getting ready for school. Amid all the shagging, they'd lost track of time.

"Come here," he said, and put his arms around her. "It's going to be fine, Willow."

"You didn't see the look on Buffy's face," she said into his chest. "She was scary."

"I can well imagine. But we'll make it right."

"Really? You really think we can?"

"Let's just say I'm extremely motivated." He kissed her. Giles is right, she thought. Their friends would see how much they loved each other, and they'd keep their secret, and get used to them.

She gave him a shaky smile. "I'm ready," she said. "Ready as I'll ever be."

He opened the door. His pleasant expression turned to a frozen stare. She turned to see what he was looking at.

The body was slumped on the ground, just outside the door. Miss Calendar's eyes were open. Willow screamed.

Tucked under her arm there was a piece of paper. Very slowly Giles reached down and pulled it free. It was a drawing of Miss Calendar, dead.

"Oh god, oh god," Willow kept saying. Giles pulled the black hair back from her neck.

"She hasn't been bitten," he said.

"Oh god, he killed her..."

Giles closed the door and led Willow to the couch. He put his hands on her shoulders. "Willow, darling, I need you to pull yourself together. I need you to go to school. I'm going to call the police, and you mustn't be here when they arrive. Do you understand?"

Numbly she nodded.

"I'll be along as soon as I can," he said. "Can you manage this?"

"Yes," she said. "If you'll be at school later."

"As soon as I can. I love you." He stroked her hair. "We're going to get through this."

She started to cry, and he pulled her close. His arms around her made her feel strong.

"I can do this," she said. Yet leaving without him - walking past the body on the doorstep - was one of the hardest things she'd ever done.

***

She wept on and off as she trudged to school. It occurred to her that she was going to be late. Then she realized it didn't matter - her first period class was Miss Calendar's. She started to cry again.

When she got to school and went to her locker, Xander zeroed in on her. "Cordelia told me something last night," he said. "And then I called Buffy, and she said the same thing. But I'm still willing to believe you if you say it isn't true." He had his big shocked eyes - the eyes he usually reserved for his parents' drunken fights and particularly bad vampire attacks. It seemed so unfair that he would look at her this way because of her and Giles.

"Look, Xander, something's happened," she said, and wiped away another tear that coursed down her face. Now Buffy and Cordelia were closing in on her too, from opposite ends of the hall. All of them staring at her, judging her. She wanted to shrink into the floor.

"Just tell me it isn't true," Xander said.

"Oh boy, is it true," Buffy said.

"You don't believe me, Xander?" Cordelia asked. "Are you still in denial?"

"I just want to hear it from Willow," he said.

Willow shook her head. "It's true. It's all true. Except that doesn't matter right now, because Miss Calendar's dead. Angel killed Miss Calendar."

Finally Xander's eyes matched the situation.

They went to the computer room, where everyone was standing around the smashed, burnt-out shell of Miss Calendar's computer on the floor. Buffy stared at it with widening eyes, then fled the room. Willow followed. In the hall, Buffy sank to her knees. "This is my fault," she said. "Because I didn't kill Angel when I had the chance."

Willow put her hand on Buffy's shoulder. "It's not your fault. It's all Angel's fault, Buffy." She had a flash of gladness that she and Giles had been upstaged - and then she hated herself for having such a horrible thought. It wasn't even true. She hadn't wanted any of this.

Giles didn't get to school until afternoon. She went into the library and saw him sitting at the table. He looked as awful as she felt. She wanted so much to put her arms around him, yet it seemed wrong somehow to go into his office or into the stacks, to sneak around. For one thing, Buffy and Xander might be keeping an eye on them, and for another, Miss Calendar was dead, hardly a time for hanky-panky.

She sat next to him. She touched his sleeve, and he jumped. "Are you all right?" she asked.

"I had to go to the police station." He stared straight ahead. "He broke her neck, you know."

"Giles," she whispered, "my parents don't come home until tomorrow. Can I come over tonight?"

He gave a laugh that jarred her. "You really want to spend the night at a crime scene?"

"I don't want to be alone."

He glanced at her. "Maybe it would be best if you stayed at Buffy's tonight."

"Giles, I can't do that. Things are not good between me and Buffy right now. And yeah, maybe this horrible thing has taken her mind off us for the time being, but still..."

He looked at her as if she were speaking much too loudly, which she wasn't, or too quickly, which she likely was. "All right," he said, "all right."

***

That evening when they walked up to Giles's door, both of them stood there and stared at the yellow tape across the doorway. Willow could still see the body, the broken figure, the black hair, though it was gone - she was gone. Giles tore the tape, and they went inside.

They sat in a daze on the sofa. She thought of how happy she would've been, before all this, to spend three nights in a row with Giles. And in a way she still was, which had to make her the world's most selfish bitch.

"Principal Snyder wants me to teach her class, until they find a replacement," she told him. Now Willow had everything Miss Calendar had wanted - Giles and her job. "God, I was so awful to her."

"What are you talking about?" he asked. "You weren't."

"Okay, maybe just in my mind I was, but still. I wanted her gone. I wanted her gone, Giles."

"This is not your fault. If anything, it's mine. My god, I saw her at school last night. She wanted to talk to me about something, but I said I didn't have time. I was on my way to pick you up from Buffy's. If I'd stayed, perhaps..."

"Perhaps Angel would've killed you too, Giles. None of this is your fault, either."

He got up and poured himself some whiskey. She had half a mind to join him.

"Did you talk to Buffy today?" she asked.

He looked at her wearily. "She blames herself for Jenny's death." In death, Willow noticed, she was Jenny again. God, she had been so catty - in her mind - so smug about Giles calling her Miss Calendar. Was that only two days ago?

"So Buffy's speaking to you, at least," she said.

"For the moment. But she looks at me as though she doesn't quite recognize me." He put his head in his hands. "What a mess."

She remembered the things he'd said before they'd found her, the body. How they were going to make it right. How no one was going to come between them. She wished he would say those things now, though she knew it was selfish of her. "Are you ashamed of what we've done?" she asked.

He looked up in surprise. "Are you?"

"Of course not. I'm proud to be with you, Giles."

"Even now?" She nodded. His expression softened. "Willow, being with you - it's been like a miracle to me. But it's far better than I deserve."

"Don't say that! You're just...grieving, and going through a lot. I love you. You're the best man I know. And I need you. Maybe it's wrong to say that right now, but I really do."

He set the glass of whiskey on the table. "Christ, I need you too," he said hoarsely, and pulled her to him. They held each other for a long time, as the tears seeped out of her eyes. When he looked at her, his eyes were wet, too.

They didn't say much the rest of the evening. He made sandwiches, and they ate in silence, watching each other, needing each other to be there. When they got into bed, they didn't have sex - just held each other until they slept.

Sometime during the night Willow found herself awake. They were facing each other in the dark. "Giles, are you awake?"

He reached out and cupped the side of her face. All at once she was fully awake as their mouths met, as their bodies pressed together. He hardened against her. Then he pushed inside her.

"I love you," he murmured again and again as he moved inside her. "I love you, Willow..."

"Giles, I love you..." She didn't come, she didn't need to. All she needed was for him to be inside her, his ragged voice in the dark saying I love you.

He moved inside her for a long time, and he came with a long, broken moan. She held him, the sticky liquid on her thighs so comforting. It was life. They were alive. "We're going to be all right," she whispered.

He sobbed in her arms. "I don't know if I can keep you safe. I need you safe..."

"We're going to keep each other safe, Giles. I love you." She felt strong. She didn't know where it came from, feeling strong and sure. It felt good to be the one to take care of him for a change. No, she did know where it came from. It came from loving him. She was not ashamed. It made her strong.

***

7

First Jenny died. Giles barely had a chance to come to grips with that before Buffy went into the hospital.

"Don't get me wrong," Willow said. She looked up from the library table where she was doing Buffy's homework. "Things have been awful lately, and I feel so bad for Buffy...but do you feel a little grateful that we've been overshadowed?"

Reluctantly he nodded. "Although I feel as though I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"Seems like a lot of shoes have been dropping lately," she said, and he smiled. She was truly a miracle. She had gotten him through this past week. When they found Jenny's body, she had been so afraid - and yet that night, when he was truly wretched, he had clung to her and wept, and she had been the strong one.

***

In the hospital bed, Buffy looked from him to Willow and back again with a puzzled air, as if trying to understand how it could possibly be true that they were sleeping together. She was apparently too weak for righteous indignation.

"I did all your assignments," Willow said. "All you have to do is sign your name."

Buffy brightened. Giles handed her a bunch of grapes, but ate rather a lot of them himself. Since he and Willow had been found out, being around the others was fairly nerve-wracking - and he was sure the feeling was mutual.

Xander gave Buffy balloons, and Cordelia, predictably, gave her nothing. Xander had grown quiet and sullen around Giles of late. Cordelia, on the other hand, obviously couldn't care less, though from time to time she'd let fly with one of her unbelievably tactless remarks - luckily never around anyone who didn't know the score.

"Did you pass the night well enough?" Giles asked Buffy.

As it turned out, she hadn't. They were called upon to investigate the death of a child, a suspicious doctor, and a young boy who saw Death. Giles was grateful they could work together once more for a common goal. He had wondered whether the revelations about him and Willow might have destroyed that possibility.

By the time they had defeated the Kindestod, and Buffy was back at school, Giles had been lulled into a false sense of security. Not where Angel was concerned - and he and Willow were still shaken by recent events. Yet those events had brought them closer. He felt more committed to her than ever, and more certain that what they had together would last.

He didn't expect to be able to explain any of this to Buffy. It was hardly something she would want to hear, so soon after the loss of the man she loved.

***

The other shoe dropped the afternoon Buffy felt up to training again. Her punches kept landing on him, and despite the padding, Giles could tell he was going to be very sore later on. Her face had that closed-off look to it - all violence, little self-awareness - that seemed to be more and more at home on her, as death and loss made their mark.

He felt for her. Still, he'd had quite enough.

"Buffy," he said, and she walloped him again. She didn't seem to hear him. She wound up for another punch. "Buffy!"

She stopped. "What?"

"Buffy, I am not your punching bag."

She pouted darkly up at him. "Are you saying we're done with training for today? There someplace you'd rather be, Giles?"

"You're still angry with me. You feel betrayed." He removed his padding and eased himself into a chair.

Now that he no longer offered himself as a target, Buffy turned on the actual punching bag. She rained blows upon it.

"I think it would behoove us to talk about this," he shouted above her grunts as she pounded the bag.

She wheeled on him, fists clenched. "Oh, now you want to talk? Months of sneaking around behind my back, and now it's time to talk?"

"Are you saying I'm not allowed to have a private life?"

"Not with my best friend! She should be with someone more her own age."

He gave a laugh. "In other words, do as you say, not as you do?"

Suddenly the fight seemed to go out of her. "Yeah, I dated an older guy - and look how well that turned out."

"I am sorry about that. I know it's difficult for you."

"Try near impossible. And since I found out about you and Willow, I haven't exactly felt like I could talk to you guys the way I could in the past. Although I guess that's the way it's supposed to be, right? Being a Slayer's not really something you can share with your friends."

It was awfully unfair, he thought, that the girl he'd met, the one who wanted desperately not to have this burden foisted upon her, should have to endure so much.

"Buffy...although I've made a commitment to Willow, that does not negate my commitment to you and the Council. I am your Watcher. I am also your friend. Willow and I kept quiet because we feared your reaction - not out of any disrespect for you."

"Okay," she said. "Maybe I get that."

"You know why Angel revealed our relationship - to create dissension among us. Divide and conquer."

She flinched at Angel's name. "I know why he did it," she said slowly. "What I don't understand is why you did it. Not the keeping it a secret, but getting involved in the first place."

"I love her." She visibly recoiled. "Buffy, you wanted to know, and I'm telling you. When the older Willow was here, she told me that she and the older Giles were married." He glossed over his involvement with that Willow. To him it did not feel like an affair with a different woman. It was all just Willow. "She opened my eyes. After our Willow returned, I discovered I did in fact have feelings for her."

"You got married?" she whispered. "I mean - later on, you're supposed to..." Tears filled her eyes.

"Buffy?"

"Sorry," she said hoarsely. "It's just...happy endings...I've begun to think they're just a myth, you know?"

"Buffy, I'm so sorry." But he also felt hopeful. Had she begun to accept their relationship?

"I'm gonna go home," she said. "I'm glad we talked. I can't say I fully understand what's going on with you guys. Maybe I'm starting to."

Thank god, he thought. "Thank you for hearing me out."

"It's gonna take time, Giles. If you guys stay together, maybe..."

That went rather well, he thought when she'd gone. Then he heaved himself up from the chair, and he winced. He was a mass of aches and pains. At least that meant he was still Buffy's Watcher.

***

Xander kept looking at her funny. Which at least was a step up from his patented Shocked Eyes. He looked at her like he was trying to work an algebra problem in his head - and Willow knew he couldn't do that. When she and Giles were in a room together, he looked from her to him and back again until she thought he might get whiplash.

Finally, one night at the Bronze when Buffy wasn't there and Cordelia was in the bathroom, he said: "Okay, I wanted to give you time, after Miss Calendar and all. But can we talk about it? Has it been long enough?"

It was a relief they were going to get this over with. She hoped. "You want to talk about me and Giles. That's fine."

"So what I want to know is..." He was trying to figure out the best way to phrase it, and then he burst out with: "Just because I got together with Cordelia, you got together with Giles?"

He could be so infuriating sometimes. She shook her head. "This has nothing to do with you, Xander. Giles and I have been together since way before I even found out about you and Cordelia."

Uh oh, the shocked eyes were back. "Wow, my female friends sure do have a thing for older guys."

"I don't have a thing for plural older guys - just one."

He seemed to be spiraling into a daze of disbelief. "You've had sex with Giles. You're having sex with Giles. You're having sex."

Willow remembered last night at Giles's place, his head between her legs as he licked and sucked her, his fingers moving inside her, until she came so hard it felt like her whole body dissolved. Her face flushed at the memory. She tried to snap out of it.

"Well, yes," she said. "That is true. But it's really not anything you need to concern yourself with." Apparently Xander was not having the sex. Who'd have thought she would be the experienced one? Cordelia returned and sat next to him. Not putting out, Willow thought - who'd have figured?

Xander gave Cordy a big nervous smile.

"So what are we talking about?" Cordelia asked, smiling indulgently. She did seem to actually care about him. Again - who'd have figured?

"Nothing," Xander said in that craven tone he used when he was on the defensive.

"Talking about Willow and a certain librarian, huh?"

"Yep," Willow said.

"Well, it's about time. You guys so need to clear the air and get over it. It's so last week's news." Willow shot her a look. "Although, of course," she added, "it's not news. It's last week's secret."

"So long as it's also this week's secret," Willow said.

"Well, duh. Like anyone even cares what you do."

Willow fervently wished that were the case. But when she looked at Xander trying not to gawp at her, she knew some people still thought it was news.

***

Giles peeked into the classroom. Did it make him a horrible person that the sight of his beloved standing in front of the class set his heart alight just the same as ever, even though the woman who should be teaching the class was dead? He wished Jenny were still alive, and yet Willow was so vibrant and lovely, and she made him so happy.

"I bet you'll think coding is pretty cool," she said. "I mean, if you find two-digit, multi-stacked conversions and primary number clusters a big hoot."

The students laughed, and her face lit up. He smiled.

The bell rang, and everyone began to file out. Then she saw him, and hurried to him. "Giles! I made them laugh, did you hear? I did the joke thing!"

He followed her to the desk. Everyone else had gone. "You did indeed." He briefly cradled the side of her face with his hand. "I'm proud of you, dearest. You're clearly doing a wonderful job."

She beamed - but then her smile faded. "I had good lesson plans. Miss Calendar had them on her computer." Her eyes went watery. "I wasn't her biggest fan - but she was a good teacher."

"Willow..." he whispered.

"I feel guilty sometimes." She glanced at Jenny's computer. "I was so jealous of her, Giles. I feel like I'm only starting to get to know her, now that she's gone."

"How do you mean?"

"I found some other things on her computer while I was looking for lesson plans. A bunch of files and Internet sites on paganism and magic and stuff. It's really interesting."

"I see." He felt a chill of fear.

She touched his hand. "I know what you're thinking. Don't worry. I'm just learning...just reading."

"That's how it begins."

"I know you said that I...that the older Willow was a big-time witch. And that she'd done some things to hurt you, and you figured it had to do with the magic."

"It happens," he said. "I know from experience."

"But it must've worked out for them, right? They ended up married." The word seemed to make her shy - for a moment she looked down at the desk. The word made his heart beat faster. "And anyway, I bet she didn't have you when she was just starting out with the witchcraft - not the way I do."

He smiled. "You think that will make a big difference?"

"It makes all the difference. You can help me to learn. You can help to keep me from making the same mistakes. And you know I would never do anything to hurt you. It won't be that way for us - I know it."

Her eyes on him were so sweet, so sure. "I believe you."

They walked into the hall. Students bustled about, everyone busy with their own dramas - apparently too busy to notice the middle-aged librarian who couldn't keep his eyes off the schoolgirl. "Is that a new dress?"

"You noticed!" She grinned. "Do you like it?"

It was simple and green, but rather shorter than her usual - though she paired it with pale stockings that added her characteristically demure touch. "I like it very much. You look beautiful."

Happiness blossomed on her face. "I bought it with you in mind. But I wasn't sure if I could pull it off."

He cocked his head toward hers. "I'd like to pull it off you right now," he murmured.

She gaped, her eyes lit with delight. "Then my work here is done!"

They sauntered towards the library. As if the idea had only just occurred to her (although he doubted that was the case), she said, "Want to do some...cross-referencing? I have a free period."

He smiled. "I know you do."

"You know my schedule? Giles, that's so sweet of you."

Happily, the library was deserted. It was awfully convenient that no one at this school besides the two of them liked to read.

"I wish we could go together to the Sadie Hawkins Dance," she said as they hurried to their place in the stacks. "I'd love to ask you to go with me."

"Oh, that would go over so well."

"I know, I know." She set down her backpack. "It's just...I love that I have somebody so wonderful to ask. Even though we can't go."

He put his arms around her. "Perhaps we can have our own celebration."

"You mean it?" She smiled up at him. "Would you dance with me?"

"If I can hold you in my arms? Absolutely."

"Oh...I would love that." She stood on tiptoe to kiss him. She tasted sweet. She always did.

He stroked her back with his fingertips and felt her shiver. His hands moved down to her ass. He kissed her sweet neck, so soft beneath his mouth. He flicked it with his tongue, and she let out a breathy sigh. "Oh, Giles," she murmured, "I want you so much..."

He was already very hard. "Want to be inside you," he whispered in her ear.

"Yes, yes..."

He put his hands on her shoulders. "We can't, darling. We almost got caught last time. And since then, we have been caught."

She cupped his erection. "So big," she sighed. He thrust into her hand, once, twice, three times. He was rapidly ceasing to care about consequences.

He kissed her again, fucking her mouth with his tongue. He put his hand up her skirt. She was already sopping wet, so ready for him. His arms around her, he eased her to the floor.

She undulated on his lap as they kissed. She moved aside just long enough for him to unzip and pull his cock out, for her to remove her shoes, pull off stockings and panties and place them on top of her backpack. She straddled him and sank down on his prick. They both gasped.

She moved on him, his thumb on her clit. "So fucking beautiful," he whispered. They kissed, and her tongue slid into his mouth. Oh, he loved this best of all, their tongues in each others' mouths, his cock inside her. As she rose and fell on him, he felt as fucked by her as vice versa. He was hers.

"Always need this," she breathed, "always..." Her face was pink, her eyes half-closed, her lovely mouth open. She was close to the edge, striving towards it with each thrust of her hips. He touched her a bit faster. She began to tremble. Her mouth contorted, and she squeezed his cock again and again. Yes, he thought, yes, yes.

She half-collapsed against him. He held her hips steady and took over. Yes, yes, up into her wetness. He looked at the place where they joined so perfectly. He pulled her to him. "Oh god, yes," he whispered, coming deep inside her as they held each other tight.

They sat still for a minute or two, he inside her, both of them breathing heavily. Then, heavy-limbed, they scrambled to their feet.

"I'm all drippy," she whispered. She reached into her backpack and produced a tissue. "I love to be all drippy with you," she added when she'd put her panties and stockings back on and stepped into her shoes. She gave him a languorous hug. "I love you, Giles."

"Willow, I love you so much."

They each took a book from the shelves. She grabbed her backpack, and they made their way out of the stacks. It occurred to Giles that perhaps they should each walk out separately - and indeed, that would've been a good idea, for as they emerged, who should walk in the library but Buffy and Xander.

"Hey," Buffy said, "what are you guys doin'?"

"Cross-referencing," Giles said - unfortunately at the same moment as Willow squeaked, "Research."

"Right..." Xander said in a long, descending tone.

Giles reached up to smooth his hair - was it terribly rumpled? Surely Willow would have told him. He hoped he had no lipstick on his face. He glanced at Willow. She looked fine - she looked far better than fine - but rather lipstickless. Perhaps Buffy and Xander wouldn't notice.

"Hey," Buffy said. "Were you two..." She lowered her voice to a whisper, though no one else was there, "making with the smoochies in the stacks?"

Giles prayed she wouldn't suspect that they'd been doing rather more than that.

Willow drew herself up in an adorable but wholly unconvincing manner. "Why, Buffy, I don't know what you mean! We were researching..." She ran out of steam as she held up the book she'd brought out from the stacks. "Researching...uh...horticulture. Because it...relates to...monsters from..."

"Nice try, Will," Xander said.

"Hey!" Willow said brightly. "What happened to you, Xander?"

"Oh, now you notice," he said. It was too true - only now did Giles notice Xander's torn shirt. "I'll have you know I was just accosted by some kind of locker monster."

"Loch Ness Monster?" Giles asked.

"Locker monster is what he said," Buffy corrected. Giles was heartily glad of something to distract her and Xander from what he'd been up to with Willow. It was some sort of poltergeist, apparently, and he was intrigued.

"Fabulous," Buffy said. "Now we're Dr. Laura for the deceased."

"Only if we can find out who this spirit is," Giles said. A vague dread filled him. "Or was," he added. No, not vague. A very specific dread.

"Giles?" Willow asked. "You think it's Miss Calendar, don't you?"

"What, are the two of you telepathic now?" Buffy asked.

"So you're thinking maybe Miss Calendar's ghost swooped down and saw you two fooling around in the stacks, and now she's all wrathful?" Xander asked.

Damn, the conversation had circled back to the stacks already. "I was thinking more along the lines of Jenny's tragic death here at school," he said. Well, yes - but also what Xander had said. The hellmouth hath no fury like a woman scorned?

Willow looked dismayed, and he felt terrible for frightening her. "We don't know for certain that it's her," he said gently. "I'll begin my research. We'll figure it out."

"As for you, young lady," Xander told Willow, "I think you've had just about enough research for one morning."

When Giles saw her frozen grin of embarrassment, he longed to put his arm around her. Instead he pretended he hadn't heard what Xander said.

***

That night Giles was in his office, immersed in research, when he heard quarreling, a man's voice shouting: "Don't walk away from me, bitch!" As he walked out to investigate, he heard a woman's voice, close by him: "I need you."

Was it Jenny? He couldn't tell. Had she really cared so much for him that she would haunt him in particular? It didn't seem likely. She had never told him I need you. Willow said it all the time. He was glad she was home safe, studying, away from whatever paranormal activity was going on here.

When he reached the hall, he saw the janitor holding a gun on Ms. Frank. The gun went off.

***

"Do you still think it might be Jenny?" Willow asked the next day in the library.

He sighed. "I don't know."

"It doesn't seem quite her speed," Buffy said.

"Yeah," Xander said. "I mean, she did some questionable things, but out-and-out violence?"

Willow's eyes widened. "Oh! The gun! It can't be Miss Calendar. Angel didn't kill her with a gun."

That, at least, was a relief. "You're right," he told her.

"Then who?" Buffy asked.

"Let me do a crosscheck on other shootings at the school," Willow said, and sat in front of the computer. Soon she found something. Giles stood behind her and peered at the screen.

"Do you mind?" Xander asked. "This is a public forum."

"What?" Giles asked, then noticed how close he was standing to Willow. He stepped back. "But I always did this, long before Willow and I were...involved. Why should it bother you now?" Of course now he knew that his standing close to her had given her goosebumps ever since they'd met. And the way she looked up at him now, he could tell he hadn't lost his touch.

"Because now I have all these pictures in my head," Xander said. Buffy raised her eyebrows, while Willow glowered at him. Giles felt almost sorry for the boy - he quailed before them. "So, Will, tell us all about the shootings!"

"It says a student murdered a teacher on the night of the Sadie Hawkins Dance," Willow said. "The rumor was they were having an affair, and she tried to break it off. After he killed her, he went into the music room and shot himself."

Giles found a copy of the 1955 yearbook, which they opened to reveal the teacher, Grace Newman, and the student, James Stanley - whom Buffy had apparently dreamed about.

"Is everybody thinking what I'm thinking?" Buffy asked.

"That it's about time for lunch?" Xander asked.

"No! That the ghost is obviously here because of you two." To Giles's astonishment, she looked from him to Willow. "See any parallels?"

"Buffy, you can't mean..." Giles said. "That isn't fair."

Willow looked like she might start to cry.

"You don't think it's a little odd that this ghost should show up so soon after the two of you got together?" Buffy asked.

"It hasn't been that soon," Willow blurted out, and Buffy's eyes widened.

"And if this is all about us," Giles said, "why did you have that dream about the boy and Miss Newman?"

She put her hands on her hips. "I'm the Slayer. Revealy dreams go with the territory."

"Perhaps," he said.

"It does sorta track," Xander said. "The whole older-younger thing."

"With some real obvious differences!" Willow cried. "Like not breaking up. And hey, not shooting each other!" She turned plaintive eyes on Giles. "Like not breaking up, right?"

"What?" Giles sat next to her and covered her hand with his. "Willow, of course...that goes without saying." She clutched his hand.

Buffy and Xander goggled at them. He faced them down. He was tired of having to justify himself. He was more than tired of them treating Willow as though she were doing something wrong. "Listen," he said, "what's important is that we figure out how to communicate with the spirit."

"Considering how violent it is, I figure the ghost is James," Buffy said. "I don't want to communicate with him. He's a murderer, and he should pay for it."

It seemed to Giles that the ghost wasn't the only one with whom Buffy didn't want to communicate.

***

Next thing Willow knew, they were fleeing a snake-filled school. That night all of them went back to bind the spirit. Willow was so pleased that Giles liked her suggestion of creating a Mangus-tripod. She knew it worried him that she wanted to learn witchcraft, but he trusted her, too, and that made her proud.

She handed everyone a sulfur-stinky scapula.

"So Giles," Cordelia said, "what are you gonna do while we're making this Mangus-whatever-thingy - make moon eyes at Willow?"

He cleared his throat.

"I know," she said, "not tactful."

Willow kinda wished they could exorcise Cordelia while they were at it.

"I'm going to patrol the halls," he said. "Watch out for paranormal phenomena."

"Whatever," Cordelia said. "If nothing else, the ghost'll probably head for the hills when it gets a whiff of this spatula thing." She fanned the air.

When the others had gone, Giles put his arm around Willow. It was so nice to be able to walk through the school like this, the way the kids who were dating did. "Please be careful," he told her before he rounded the corner alone. She walked up the stairs.

She hadn't told him, but she still had her doubts. Maybe the ghost was Jenny Calendar, angry at her and Giles. Maybe they had caused this. She loved being with him, yet her friends' attitudes towards them made it easy for her to believe this was all their fault.

Willow set down her candle. A hand reached up through the floor and grabbed her, tried to pull her under. "Giles! Help!" Was this Miss Calendar, now that she knew why Giles hadn't taken her back? Was she taking her revenge?

"Willow!" There was his voice, his running footsteps. He ran up the stairs and grasped her arms. Frowning with the effort, he pulled her out, and they rolled down the stairs, her arms around his neck. They landed at the bottom, his body covering her. Then they rolled again, and she was on top of him, both of them breathing hard. Definitely a position she'd never expected to be in with him at exactly this spot.

"Willow, are you all right?"

"Yeah." She pulled a strand of hair away from his face. "Deja vu, isn't it?"

He gave a laugh. "Indeed." They got up and sat on the stairs.

She took his hand. "Thank you for saving me."

He looked at her as if she were the only precious thing in the world.

"Giles, do you think this is about us? Did we cause all this?"

"I don't believe we did." He squeezed her hand.

"But if the ghost is James, what if he's...I don't know, jealous of us or something? Because we're together, and he didn't get to stay with Miss Newman?"

Just then the clock struck midnight. They walked up the stairs and lit the candle. Then they were running from a whole lot of wasps.

***

After it was all over, and Buffy and Angel had reenacted the dead lovers' final moments, Buffy sat in Giles's office.

"Are you feeling any better?" he asked.

"James picked me," she said. "I guess I was the one he could relate to. He was so sad."

He sat beside her. "They can both rest now."

A tiny smile flickered across her face. "But the two of you - you're not sad. You make each other happy. I can tell."

Giles barely dared to believe what he was hearing.

"Giles, I owe you and Willow an apology. This wasn't about the two of you. It wasn't even remotely the same thing."

"Willow will be happy to hear you say that."

"How about you?"

He smiled.

***

They rescheduled the Sadie Hawkins Dance, and Willow and Giles had their own celebration as well. They stood in his living room, arms around each other. They didn't so much dance as sway slightly to the music on the stereo, but as far as Willow was concerned, that was perfect. She'd never heard a lot of the songs he played - they were on LPs, not CDs. Some he'd already played for her.

"Who's this?" she asked, smiling up at him.

"Al Green, sweetheart."

"I like it a lot. I like your record collection."

That made him smile. "I'm glad." He kissed her.

This was better than any school dance. They held each other tight. She looked forward to the day when they could dance together in public, but things were looking up. Buffy was actually beginning to accept them. Xander...well, that might take more time. But they already had what Al Green sang about with his voice like caramel: love and happiness. Even Buffy was starting to see that.

***

8

They celebrated Willow's seventeenth birthday at the Bronze. Buffy gave her a pink shirt, and Xander gave her a CD. Then it was Giles's turn. He handed her a little wrapped box that made her think crazily of engagement rings - even though it wasn't exactly that kind of little box, and even though she was still a year too young for that. She opened the box and held up a slender chain from which dangled a sparkling green gemstone.

"Wow," Cordelia said. "That is a nice piece of jewelry."

"It's beautiful, Will," Buffy said.

Willow couldn't stop staring at it.

"Do you like it?" Giles asked. "The crystal - it matches your eyes."

"Well, loosely speaking," Xander said, and Buffy smacked his arm. "Ow..."

"It's beautiful, Giles. I love it." She wanted so much to throw her arms around him and kiss him. Instead she hugged him chastely, the necklace held tight in her fist. He put his arms around her and held her pretty damn tight, considering they were in public. Even though they couldn't kiss, they were together, they had each other. Buffy didn't have the guy she'd loved - the guy she'd shared her birthday with. That thought gave Willow a chill, and she hugged Giles tighter. "I love you," she whispered.

"Let me help you with that," he said, and she pulled her hair back so he could put the necklace on her.

Xander and Cordelia were kissing on the couch. "Jeez, get a room," Buffy said. They were oblivious. Why should they be allowed to make out in public and not her and Giles?

Giles must've seen her crestfallen look - because he whispered in her ear, "Do you have any idea what I'm going to do to you later?" She tried to keep her expression even, though her whole body went hot. She looked down at the necklace. She had loved the book Giles gave her for Valentine's Day - his father's book - but this, this was something she could wear to remind herself that he loved her, something to wear with pride.

"Can I get you anything?" he asked.

She suddenly realized it was the first time they'd been out socially together. Of course they couldn't go on a regular date without the others here as camouflage - but she smiled. He was acting like a real boyfriend on a date. "Decaf mocha?" she asked.

Buffy cleared her throat, and Giles looked her way. "Aren't you going to ask if any of us want anything, Giles?"

"Sorry," he said. "Of course, Buffy - would you like something?"

"No...I'm just being a pain."

"Xander? Cordelia?"

They'd come up for air. "We're gonna go dance," Cordy said, and they headed toward the stage. There was something else she and Giles couldn't do - but she couldn't really picture him dancing to this band.

When he'd gone off to get Willow's drink, Buffy grinned at her. "I can't believe I'm saying this, Will, but I think you've got yourself a keeper."

Buffy's acceptance made her so happy, she nearly burst into tears. "I think he really loves me, Buffy."

"He does. It's obvious. I've just been too absorbed in my own stuff to notice."

"Well, you've had pretty heavy-duty stuff. Plus we were trying to be sneaky. And we still do have to. Sneak, I mean."

"I know. But you have a lot. I'm happy for you, Will. Even though..." She stopped.

"What?" She expected Buffy to say, Even though he's old enough to be your father. Instead she said, "It's just painful, sometimes, to see anybody in love. Because of what I've lost."

Willow hugged her friend. "I know. I want you to be happy, too."

"Meanwhile," Buffy said, "you guys can be my happy ending."

After Willow had her mocha, she and Giles decided it was past time that they were alone. They said goodnight to their friends. When they got into his car, Giles said, "Happy birthday, darling," and they lunged for each other. He kissed her ravenously. "Christ, I couldn't wait to do this..."

"Me too..." she managed to say as he nuzzled her neck. "But...we should go home. Someone might see us..."

"You're right," he said, his hand caressing her knee, then moving upward. "Just need to drive back to my place...can fuck you properly..."

She crushed her mouth against his. Then she made herself stop. "Drive," she breathed. And he did, but with her hand stroking his thigh and wandering to his crotch, and his mouth on hers and hands all over her at red lights, it was a wonder they didn't crash the car. Luckily the car didn't go very fast.

Back at Giles's, they barely made it to the couch. Their clothes were strewn about, and Giles was inside her, telling her how unbelievably beautiful she'd looked at the Bronze, how he'd wanted to take her right there in front of everyone, how envious they would've been of him, how lucky he was to have her. And then she was coming, as much from his words as from his cock inside her, his pelvis rubbing against hers. Then he was fucking her even harder and moaning and coming.

"I hate to take you home," he murmured afterwards, stroking her hair. "Especially on your birthday."

"I wanna stay more than anything. But I really don't think my parents would buy my having an all-night study session on my birthday."

"Do you think they'd notice your being gone all night?" His lips grazed hers. That was all it took to stir her into wanting him again.

"Usually not, but this is pretty much the one day of the year when they pay attention."

"Although it's worked out in our favor oftener than not, I truly am sorry that your parents treat you so shabbily. You're worth so much more than that. You know that, don't you?"

His eyes were so soft and warm. "I do," she said. "You make me feel so...important, so valued."

"Oh, darling," he said, and pulled her closer, "you have no idea how important, how valued you are."

***

One Saturday morning, a few days after Xander had narrowly escaped being turned into a sea creature, Giles was dozing in bed, when there was a knock at the door. Then a series of knocks. "Just a minute!" he called, dragging himself up and donning his robe. When he got downstairs and opened the door, he smiled - albeit in the midst of rubbing his eyes and suppressing a yawn. "Good morning," he said, and let her in.

"Did I wake you?"

A yawn obscured his reply.

"Sorry...I guess I could've let myself in, but I didn't want to startle you. Or I could've phoned, but that would've spoiled the surprise."

He moved towards her, then noticed she was carrying a box. She opened it. "Breakfast!" she announced triumphantly.

He peered inside. "Donuts?"

"I got plenty of your favorite." She indicated the jellies nestled among the buttermilk and chocolate.

"That was very thoughtful of you."

"Thoughtful enough to make up for me waking you?"

"I can't think of a nicer way to start the day," he said, with only a smallish yawn. They sat on the couch - he flopping down sleepily - and she put the box of donuts on the table. She smiled and snuggled in his arms.

"Do you want a donut?" she asked.

"Mmm..."

"Was that 'Mmm,' I'm hungry or 'Mmm,' I'm about to fall back to sleep?"

He gazed at her from beneath his heavy lids. "Mmm...you feel wonderful."

"Oh!" She seemed delighted, as if that option hadn't occurred to her. "Well, I think I'm going to have one." She tried to reach for the box, but he held her fast. "Giles..." He loosened his grip, and she grabbed the box.

She picked out a buttermilk donut with multicolored sprinkles, he a jelly. As he ate, some jelly dripped onto his hand. "Oh, bugger," he murmured. "Don't want to get jelly on the couch."

Willow set her half-eaten donut on the lid of the box. She took his hand and sucked the jelly off. He was suddenly completely awake. When she'd finished licking and sucking him clean, he kissed her. She tasted sugary. "Right," he said, "we're going back to bed."

Some time later, they lay spent and drowsing in the rumpled sheets. "So," Giles said, pushing some unruly strands of hair back from her face, "to what do I owe this unexpected pleasure?"

"Woke up this morning and missed you," she said, her head on his chest. "But also..."

"Yes?" His hand idly stroked her back.

"I've been thinking about summer. We won't be able to see each other as much, so I wanted to come up with new ways for us to spend time together."

"Whatever makes you think we won't see each other as much?"

"For one thing, I won't be in school! I'll miss seeing you in the mornings."

How was it he hadn't thought about this? The prospect of seeing her was the first thing he thought about when he woke up each weekday. It put the spring in his step.

"You'll be at school when summer school's happening," she went on. "Maybe I should take a class."

"Surely not just to see me." Yet it pleased him that she would consider such a thing. "Willow, don't you want to relax this summer? You've certainly earned it."

"Well, I love school. And I love you. I mean, not in that order. What I mean is, you and school, it's like the perfect combination. Like vanilla ice cream and chocolate syrup."

He grinned. "And which of the two am I, in your analogy?"

"Definitely chocolate." She kissed him. "And hey," she added, "now I'm craving a donut." She'd brought the box upstairs with them, and she reached for it. They shared a chocolate donut with sprinkles. "Besides, I won't be able to use the 'studying all night at Buffy's or Xander's' excuse during summer."

"You mean you can't spend the night here all summer?" Despite the fact they didn't spend the night together all that often, he no longer slept well without her.

"Hopefully my parents will go out of town, and then I can."

"Perhaps they would accept an anonymously donated world cruise?" He popped a piece of donut in his mouth.

She giggled. "Maybe I can sneak out from time to time. But you see what I mean about summer?"

"I do." He sighed. "It's dreadful."

"So I thought I could come over sometimes, first thing in the morning, like today. We could pretend I'd been here all night."

"Not exactly the same thing, dearest...although this is wonderful, too."

"I wish I were older already, so I could be with you all the time, every night." She scrutinized him. "You want that too, right?"

He kissed her. "You know I do."

"You'll wait for me, won't you? It seems like such a long time."

"Just one year. Slightly less. And of course I'll wait for you. It's not like we won't be together in the meantime. We're together now." He remembered how slowly time moved when one was a teenager. Yet it moved slowly for him, too, waiting for her to turn eighteen, when they would no longer have to keep their relationship a secret.

"So long as we can just stay alive," she said, "and not get bit by any vampires."

"Well, the other Willow and Giles managed to survive. It stands to reason we can, too."

"We have to, Giles. I'd just die if we died and didn't get to be together."

"We won't. I really believe that." What other choice did he have? The alternative was unthinkable. She was so warm, so sweet, naked in his arms but for the necklace he'd given her, and when he kissed her, she tasted like chocolate.

***

When she and Buffy told him about the disk they'd found, Giles looked stunned. "What are you saying?" he asked.

Buffy held out the printout. "The curse," she said. "This is it."

"Looks like Miss Calendar was trying to replicate the original curse," Willow said. "To restore Angel's soul again." She thought this might be her chance to make peace with Miss Calendar, to make things right - and, of course, to help Buffy. But Giles looked as though he'd seen a ghost.

"This is good, right?" Cordelia said. "We can curse him again."

"This certainly points the way," he said, "but the ritual itself requires a greater knowledge of the black arts than I can claim."

Willow approached him. "You know I've been going through Miss Calendar's files and researching the black arts. I may be able to work this."

He put his hands on her shoulders. "Willow...channeling such potent magicks through yourself could open a door that you may not be able to close. And while you might want to follow in the other Willow's footsteps - "

"Excuse me - what?" Xander asked. "What do you mean, follow in her footsteps?"

"The other Willow was a witch," Buffy said.

"Am I the only one out of the loop here?" Xander asked. Willow felt bad. She had only just told Buffy more about the other Willow, now that their friendship was back on track. Her friendship with Xander, on the other hand, had suffered greatly since she'd gotten involved with Giles, and especially since he'd found out about them. She wondered if they'd ever be close again.

"I didn't know about it either," Cordelia said. "That other Willow wasn't all warty or anything, was she?"

"Witches are so not like that!" Willow said.

Cordy rolled her eyes. "Sorry - just checking!"

"The point is," Willow said, turning back to Giles, "I may be the best person to do the spell."

"It's true that curing Angel seems to have been Jenny's last wish," he said.

"Oh, and you cared so much about Miss Calendar's wishes when you were putting the moves on Willow," Xander said.

Giles turned on him. "That is enough!"

"Xander!" Willow said. This was really bad. Giles looked completely enraged.

"Come on, Will," Xander said, "you know it's true. Angel killed Miss Calendar - but hey, all is forgiven? Give him back his soul?" He turned to Buffy. "You wanna forget all about Miss Calendar's murder so you can get your boyfriend back." Then he turned to Giles. "And you want to forget Miss Calendar, because you've moved on."

"How dare you?" Giles advanced on him. Buffy got between him and Xander.

Willow tried to stop herself from shaking. "Buffy," she said, "what do you wanna do?" At her quavering voice, Giles turned.

"I don't know," Buffy said. "I don't know..." She walked out of the library.

Willow stared at Xander. He glowered at her - then he got up and marched out of the library. Cordy shrugged, then followed him.

They were alone, thankfully. He took her hand.

"I'm sorry," she said. "He had no right to say those things."

"Don't apologize for him," he murmured. That angry look he'd worn was gone. He gazed at her with tenderness. "Are you all right?"

She felt on the verge of tears. "No," she said. "But I'm so glad we'll be together the next few nights." Her parents had left that morning to visit family in Phoenix.

"I'm glad, too. Especially with summer looming."

She sighed. "Why does it have to be so difficult?"

"In spite of everything, it feels terribly simple to me. I love you, Willow."

She squeezed his hand. "Giles, I - "

Jonathan walked in, and they let go of each other's hands. "I need a book on the Cuban Missile Crisis."

***

Pretty soon the situation in Sunnydale made the Cuban Missile Crisis look like a walk in the park. It was save-the-world time again.

Willow sat cross-legged on the library table. She was nervous, but also excited to be doing her first big spell, and to be doing it with Giles. Kendra guarded the doors. Cordelia made with the incense, while Xander...well, Xander did nothing really, except watch with low-key disapproval.

Willow cast the stones. She turned to Giles and nodded.

He opened the volume and read: "Quod perditum est, invenietur." He was so sexy when he read those dead languages. Oh, the things she was gonna do to him tonight, if the world didn't end...

Okay, she told herself, not now with the lust. She began: "Not dead, nor not of the living. Spirits of the interregnum I call."

They hadn't gotten very far before vampires burst in. "Get out! Go!" Giles shouted to her and Cordelia.

She went up the stairs, praying that Giles would be right behind her - but he wasn't. Xander was fighting a vampire. She hid behind a bookcase. Giles, please hurry up, she thought. Please be all right.

The bookcase crashed down on her, and she screamed. It hurt and it didn't. It happened too fast for her to feel it. She had a flash of memory - she and Giles sitting on the floor, she straddling him, his eyes cherishing her as she moved on him - Giles - then she lost consciousness.

***

He came to on the floor...somewhere. The first thing he saw was Angel's gleeful face. "Hi, Rupert. I wasn't sure you were gonna wake up." Nimbly he leapt to his feet.

Slowly Giles stood. "What do you want?"

"Sorry to take you away from your little schoolgirl. I know how much fun schoolgirls can be. Maybe I should give your girl a try - she's so cute, so helpless. I bet you enjoy that about her."

"You stay away from Willow. I swear, if you hurt her, I'll kill you." Then he saw Acathla, the sword protruding from it.

Angel chuckled. "I'll tell you what. You tell me about Acathla, what I'm doing wrong with the rituals, and maybe I won't fuck and kill Willow. Not necessarily in that order."

Giles shook his head. "If I tell you what you want to know, you'll unleash hell on earth, and we'll all die."

"Well, there is that. Besides, I don't even know if your girlfriend survived my minions' little onslaught."

Please, Giles thought - please let her be all right.

"I can see that your girlfriend's not a valuable enough bargaining chip. Fine with me. I really wanna torture you, anyway."

And he did.

***

Willow couldn't wake up. Or maybe she didn't want to. Her head felt huge and full of cotton batting, like a fluffy cloud with a headache. "I love you," Giles said. Giles was there. She needed to wake up. With a tremendous effort, she forced herself up through layers of sleep. She squeezed his hand.

"Willow?"

"Giles," she whispered. "Giles..."

"No, Will...it's me, Xander."

She opened her eyes. "Xander...where's Giles?"

He bent towards her. He looked worried. "Giles isn't here."

It was coming back to her - vampires in the library. "Can you call him for me? I know it makes you uncomfortable, but I need to see him."

"Willow...we think Angel has him."

"What?" She closed her eyes tight. "No. Oh, no..." She started to cry. It made her head feel even weirder than it already did. "Giles..."

He was still holding her hand. She tried to pull it away, but he wouldn't let go. "We'll get him back."

She looked at him, at his wholly unconvincing eyes. "God, oh god. What if he's..."

"Willow, we'll get him back."

She couldn't stop thinking about how they were supposed to spend the night together, with her parents out of town. If they could just find him, everything would be okay. They'd go back to his place and be together. It would be like none of this had happened. She couldn't seem to get her mind around the idea that she might never see him again.

***

"Rupert, buddy...I'm here to tell you, I'm impressed."

He wondered if this had happened to the other Giles. If only the older Willow could've warned him. If this had happened to the other Giles, he had lived through it. But if it hadn't...

Willow, he thought. Please let her be all right. Please let me see her again. This can't be all the time we got to have together. They got married. I never told her that I wanted to marry her too. I was afraid it was too soon, she was too young, there would be time to tell her, later...

"Tell me when it hurts."

***

Willow was on the phone with Buffy. "Any luck finding Giles?"

"Yep - I got a lucky break." She sounded confident.

Thank god, thank god. "What?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"He has to be okay, Buffy," she said. "I love him so much."

"I know. I'll get him back - I promise."

"Thank you." She was trying not to cry again. "I'm sorry I didn't get to cure Angel." It was hard for her to think of anything but Giles. The world was still slated to end if Buffy didn't get to Angel first - but she couldn't think about the world, or even her own life (since, after all, she was in the world).

"It just wasn't meant to be," Buffy said. "I know I'm never gonna get him back the way he was. It just makes it easier."

And then it occurred to Willow. She needed to try the spell again.

***

"I don't like it," Xander said. It seemed like that was all he said these days. "You're talking about messing with powerful magic, and you're weak."

"This can help save Giles. It can help Buffy." She let him have it with her resolve face. Then she sent Cordy to the library to get her magic stuff, and told Xander to go let Buffy know what she was planning.

It would be a little weird doing a spell with Cordelia, but if it could help Giles, it was worth a try.

***

The torture had ceased for the moment. Drusilla wiped his forehead with a cloth. He braced for attack. Perhaps she would kill him - even turn him. Given the choice, he hoped she would merely kill him.

Instead she called him "poor thing." She stared at him with those dark, amoral eyes. "Be in me," she said, and he could not look away. "See with your heart."

Then she was with him, as close as Drusilla had been. "Willow...my darling girl. Thank god you're all right."

She smiled. It made him forget the pain to see her smile like that. "Giles, I'm fine."

"I was so afraid I'd never see you again."

"I'll never leave you," she said. "I love you."

"I love you. God, I love you. We have to get out of here. Angel...he'll hurt you."

She touched his cheek. "Did you tell Angel? About the ritual?"

"No. We have to get him away from Acathla."

Her beautiful eyes gleamed in the dark. "Tell me what to do. We'll be together. I love you more than anyone. Just tell me what to do."

He told her Angel's blood was the key to awakening Acathla. Then Willow kissed him. Thank god, he thought, everything is going to be all right. But her lips were so cold.

She pulled away. "Sorry...I was in the moment." Drusilla's voice. He opened his eyes. "Willow..." he whispered. Drusilla laughed.

***

"You just wave the incense," Willow said from her hospital bed. "I'll handle the Latin and the translation. It should work out okay. I hope."

"I don't know about this," Cordelia said. "Just don't accidentally turn me into a toad or give me warts or anything."

"You're awfully fixated on warts, aren't you?"

She began to recite the Latin, thinking of Giles. Then she thought of the older Willow. Had she done this spell too? "Not dead, nor not of the living..."

***

Xander appeared at the mansion. At first Giles thought it was another trick. "Willow," he said. "Is she..."

"She's going to be fine," Xander said, supporting him. "But you don't look so hot." He got him out of there. He managed to flag down a car and got the driver to take them to the emergency room.

"I must see Willow," he said at the hospital.

"You can barely walk," Xander said. "Let a doctor take a look at you first."

"Are you sure she's all right?"

"Head trauma - but the doctors say she'll be fine." Xander stared at him. "Aren't you in a lot of pain?"

He gave a ragged laugh. "Of course I am. That hardly matters."

The coin seemed to drop then - and Xander smiled at him for the first time since he'd found out about him and Willow. "Soon as we get you checked out, I promise I'll take you right to her."

It felt like hours before a doctor saw him. Finally Xander helped him walk to Willow's room.

"Hey, Will - got yourself a visitor."

She looked so small and pale in the bed. But when she saw him, her face lit up, and she opened her arms. He got to her as quickly as he could.

"Willow, are you all right? Thank god you're safe..."

"Me? What about you?"

He sat on the edge of the bed and put his arms around her - gently, for both their sakes. She was crying softly. "You're hurt," she whispered. "Your poor head is all gashed." She reached up and touched his forehead. "And your fingers...did he break your fingers?"

"I'm all right. Everything's going to be fine."

"Unless the world ends, of course," Xander said. But he was smiling slightly.

"I think the spell worked," Willow said. "I felt something go through me." She brightened. "Giles, I did the spell!"

"You're a wonder," he said.

"Maybe Angel got his soul back before he could, you know, end the world," she said. "Maybe Buffy's with him now."

"Perhaps she'll be along shortly." He couldn't help but think she would. After all, he had survived, and he was far less hardy than Buffy. He had survived to be with his beloved again.

"I'm gonna leave the two of you alone for awhile," Xander said. "I'll be out in the hall. I'll give you a heads up if your parents show, Will."

"Xander, thank you," Willow said. "Thank you for bringing him back to me."

"Yes," Giles said, "thank you."

His eyes shone. "I'm just glad you're both gonna be okay." He left the room and shut the door.

"Did you see that?" Willow asked. "He's on our side. Took both of us getting all injured, but..."

He kissed her. It had made his blood run cold when he realized he'd kissed Drusilla. But Willow's warm, soft lips blotted out that memory.

"So if Buffy's okay, and the world doesn't end, and you and I heal up, everything will be great," she said. "Oh, and I still need to be a year older."

"Slightly less than a year," Giles said, and she smiled. They were together. Somehow he believed everything would be all right.

***

9

Giles phoned from Seattle Friday night with the usual news. "Another false lead, I'm afraid."

"Uh huh." A burst of irrational anger went through her. Lousy summer, lousy false leads. Thank god school would be starting soon.

"Willow? Are you there?"

She was sitting on the edge of the bed. Her house felt very big and lonely. "I'm here. I wish you were."

"I'll be home tomorrow morning."

"My parents left this afternoon." The long-awaited parental trip out of town, and here she was, alone.

"I know. I'm sorry. But we'll have a wonderful weekend together, as we planned."

"Almost as we planned." She sighed. "I'm sorry - I'm being all bitchy. You know I want you to look for her. I just miss you is all."

"I miss you, darling."

When they hung up, she just sat there. Friday night. She supposed she could call Xander. Maybe he'd want to rent a video or go to the Bronze. Nah, she'd rather mope. Or maybe she could try another spell. Fire out of ice?

An hour later, she'd burned a nice hole in her bedspread. Perfect. Maybe she'd better stick with making feathers float for the time being.

She stared at the blackened hole she'd made. Damn false leads. Damn Buffy running away.

She felt guilty for thinking that. She missed Buffy and hoped she was okay - but yes, sometimes she resented all the time Giles spent looking for her.

It hadn't been a bad summer - much of it had been very nice. When summer school was in session, she visited the library often enough, and no one seemed to think that odd, geek that she was. Once she'd gotten over her fear of the stacks (what with being crushed unconscious under the shelves), she and Giles had fun there again. They fooled around in his office, too. Sometimes they'd just kiss, sometimes she got down on her knees before him. Sometimes he pushed into her, standing up, or on the floor.

They spent plenty of evenings and weekends together, too. After summer school finished, she would walk to his place in the morning, let herself in and crawl into bed with him. Sometimes she brought donuts. But every week, or every other week at least, he went out of town looking for Buffy.

Cordelia was out of town for the summer, and she hung out with Xander, both of them missing their respective people - although Willow assumed she missed Giles much more, because who could miss Cordelia that much?

Some nights she patrolled with Giles and Xander, sometimes Oz too (when there wasn't a full moon), and they tried to do some slaying, with mixed results. But they didn't die, which was the main thing. When Giles was away, sometimes she patrolled with Xander and Oz, and Giles begged her to be careful. She was.

It was still early, but Willow got undressed, put on a sleep shirt and crawled into bed with her John Donne book. She read a couple of poems and stared at the inscription: To Willow, with all my love, RG. The thought popped into her head: Not all his love. And that was stupid, because she loved Buffy too. She wished so much that Buffy were here, so she could tell her about her forays into witchcraft and her serious dating with Giles. She talked to Giles about these things, of course, but she missed her girlfriend.

She read the inscription again, and this time no insecure thoughts blurted at her. He loved her. He'd be home tomorrow.

***

The next day, he picked her up in the afternoon, and they drove to Breakers Woods. "Are you sure you're not too tired from your flight?"

He put his hand on hers. "I've been so looking forward to this, Willow."

"Me, too. Our first-ever trip out of town together! Even if it's just barely out of town."

They walked through the woods hand in hand, and it was almost stereotypically romantic - except for the part where he showed her where the Druids had performed rituals. That was more their speed.

"It's so green here," she said. "Nice to be someplace with greenery that's not a cemetery." He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it. "What were you gonna say?"

"I was just thinking of home...of England."

"'England's green and pleasant land'?"

He smiled. "Quite. Have you been reading Blake?" She got the feeling he'd wanted to say something more, but she didn't press.

Before nightfall, he set up a tent. "It would be lovely to sleep under the stars with you," he said, "but on the off chance anyone should show up..."

"Just another thing we'll have to wait until I'm eighteen to do," she grumbled.

He put on his glasses and gazed mildly at her. "Are you still feeling cross about my leaving town?"

She shook her head. "I'm sorry - I'm just cranky. It's so good to be with you." She put her arms around him and pressed her face into his chest.

It began to get chilly, and he built a fire. They ate the sandwiches, fruit and chocolate she'd packed, and he brewed some tea over the campfire. "It's quite impressive that you know how to do all this stuff," she said. "Pitching tents and building fires. You're so...capable."

He put his arms round her. "I'm glad you approve."

Absently she rubbed the nubbly sleeve of his sweater as she stared into the fire. "It's been years since I've done anything hike-y - not since I was in the girl scouts. I slept under the stars once - and I got a mosquito bite on my nose."

He gave a chuckle and kissed her cheek, kissed her hair.

"I was a lousy girl scout...I was much happier in school, even though the kids picked on me. I did like toasting marshmallows, though. Too bad we didn't bring any." She looked up - there were stars, some clouds. "I'm so glad school's starting soon."

When she turned, he was gazing at her as if searching for the little girl she'd been. "Are you sure everything's all right, dearest? You sound a little...dispirited."

She fought the urge to say Everything's fine. "Well, there is something. But it's gonna sound so petty, and you'll think I'm a terrible person."

"I sincerely doubt that, Willow."

Sometimes she was afraid she'd say the wrong thing, and he'd realize he didn't love her after all. But she couldn't live in fear of that. "Okay...I'll say it. Sometimes I'm jealous of Buffy."

"Jealous of Buffy? But why?"

"I mean, I know you don't feel about her the way you feel about me. Right?"

He kissed her lips. "Right."

"I know you care about her - and so do I. But she got to spend so much time with you, training and all. And I know she didn't appreciate it the way I would. Not that I'd want to train with you, I mean, but...you spent all this time with her, because you're her Watcher. And now you're spending all this time looking for her - and I really hope she's okay, and I miss her a lot. But I can't help but feel like it doesn't matter to her that you're looking for her...not the way it matters to me to have you with me. And I know that sounds awful."

He listened with his head slightly bowed, just a trace of a smile at the corners of his mouth. "It doesn't sound awful. I understand - and I'm glad you told me."

"I just...want more. More time with you. More everything."

"Does it help at all to know that I feel exactly the same way?"

"Actually it helps a lot." It was such a relief to finally say all this stuff and have him be so sweet about it.

"In fact...there's something I've been wanting to tell you for some time."

Oh, now what? "Something bad?"

He smoothed her hair. "I hope you'll think it's something good."

"Tell me."

He looked at the fire for a good couple of minutes. Then he turned to her. "It's just that I want more with you, too. So much more. When you're older, when we can, I want to marry you."

Her mouth opened so wide, she could've caught flies - even mosquitoes. "Wow. Wow..." It took a minute to sink in. Then her happiness rose to such a pitch, it didn't seem quite possible. "Giles, I want that, too!"

"You do? I had hoped..." He cradled the side of her face with his hand, leaned in and kissed her. "I'm so glad you feel the same." He kissed her again.

"You really didn't know I would? How long have you been thinking about this?"

A rueful grin flashed across his face. "For a very long time. It's just that you're still so young. Most girls your age are thinking about who they're going to the school dance with, and where they might want to go to college - not making lifetime commitments."

"I made that commitment to you long ago, Giles."

"Earlier, when I mentioned England...I wanted to say that someday I'd like to take you there with me. Perhaps even to live there."

"Really?" She felt a bit overwhelmed at the prospect - but also excited. "You know, speaking of college, I was thinking of applying to Oxford and Cambridge."

"That's wonderful. You should."

"But what about the Hellmouth and Buffy and Watchering and all?"

He pulled her closer. "There's plenty of time to think about all of that."

She imagined being with Giles in England. The British Museum. Oxford. Some big green countryside-like field. It seemed unreal that she could have all of that with him. "I used to fantasize about it," she said. "Before you told me how you felt about me. That you would take me to England and show me where you used to work. That we would be together."

"You did?" He got that melty expression that so often seemed to come over him when he looked at her. Then he pulled himself together. "But I thought it was Xander you used to daydream about."

"Well, yes...Xander. Also John Cusack. But Giles, that it turned out to be you...that's still so beyond my wildest dreams."

"Even with all my...Watchering? Not to mention my being so much older than you?"

"That's all part of who you are. I wouldn't change a thing."

"Nor would I..." He kissed her at length. It occurred to Willow - although thinking was pretty much optional at this point - that this had turned out to be one of the best nights of her life.

A little later he put out the fire, and they got in the tent. They made love in the zipped-together sleeping bags. He moved inside her, his body furnace-hot, and they began to sweat, though the night air kept her nose cold. His face was close to hers in the dark, and she reached up to touch his hair, to put her arms around his neck and kiss him. His tongue pushed inside her mouth.

She wrapped her legs around his, moved her hands over his sleek back and down to his ass to push him in deeper again and again. That seemed to excite him, and she felt him grow even bigger inside her. "I'm close..." he breathed. "Oh, Willow...I love you so..." She caressed his open mouth with hers until, with a last hard thrust, he moaned and arched his back.

"I love you, Giles," she whispered, holding him. He stayed inside her, hard enough for her to grind up against him, the tension quickly building. She cried out and contracted deliciously around him.

They lay in each other's arms, the quiet of the woods surrounding them, punctuated by an owl's occasional who whoing. He fell asleep first. Hopefully no vampires frequented these parts - but they had stakes, crosses and holy water in case. That made her think of Buffy, with a flash of guilt to be so happy when very likely her friend was not. But Buffy had accepted her and Giles, and she wanted their happiness. That much Willow knew. She slept.

***

In the morning they drove back to town, so they could spend Sunday at his house - which meant reading and listening to music, eating and making love. She kept smiling at him in the car. "I feel so relaxed," she said. "That was a wonderful trip."

"I thought so too, dearest."

"Though I am craving a hot shower."

"We'll take one as soon as we get home."

As they neared his place, the usual cares descended upon her - finding Buffy, keeping their relationship a secret, fighting vampires. But Giles looked so beautiful, his intelligent eyes focused on the road, flicking over to look at her, a smile playing across his lips.

She thought of the other Willow, who had made this happen for her. She believed it would have happened between her and Giles eventually, but she was so glad she hadn't had to wait until she was older. She sent a silent thanks to the older Willow, wherever she was, already married to Giles, as she would be one day.

---
The End

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